• Patty Stern

From the Heart


For this week's blog entry, I'm going in a more personal direction. Hey, it's February, which is all about LOVE... This past Sunday while having brunch with a girlfriend, we engaged in a conversation about business...and people...and the effect one person can have on another persons confidence long-term. Everyone gets to have a bad day where they say or do something that is hurtful...and that's okay because it's human. However, what separates the wheat from the chaff and shows good character or bad character is what happens next...

  • Good character is the person emailing or (preferably) picking up the phone to CALL YOU, discuss what transpired, mutually agree on a resolution/apologize and move on.

  • Bad character is never hearing from the person...and that generally tells me they're either too ignorant to realize they hurt you or, even worse, they just don't care!


I wish I could tell you I have a thick skin that can quickly brush off hurtful behavior by others (whether it's aimed at me or someone else)...but I don't and I don't want to. I was groomed "old school" in business by my parents...two brilliantly successful people who taught me right out of college about character, integrity, honesty and giving back with a heart.

We hear "it's just business" all the time, as though that's an excuse to treat another person poorly and not consider the repercussions of an action. I had an incident transpire four years ago by a colleague that was like a knife to my heart; that cut so deep I walked away from a situation where I was truly doing good and making a difference. It was the right decision, yet in doing so, I allowed my mojo to be affected. You know what happens when your mojo is compromised? You might start questioning yourself, you might not be as bold and daring as you always have been, you might shy away from being around certain groups of people. In short, you stop being who you are!

So on Sunday, I'm telling my friend how much stronger I feel now...that I've become more comfortable in my skin and what a shame that I lost four years because of the damage that I ALLOWED this person to cause. My friend's response was to not look back...rather, look how far I've come to regain that mojo and confidence despite the efforts of a few to knock me down. As I prepare for my next birthday this weekend, I do so with a thicker skin than I had a year ago. And, as I review the situations I've experienced that hurt my heart, I'm letting it all go...I've got my mojo back! Now...what may I do for you?....


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